The last two points & thanks for reading :)

Ok, first I want to thank you for visiting my site and reading my blogs! This will be my last blog about my story with Sam and Roof because I think that there are just two questions you could aks yourself now. 1. What about your relationship with Sam? and 2. How does Sam looks like? I will answer these last questions now:

1. Sam and me we had sex again, the first time since Roof was born. It was after the day we spent in our small family of three. Sam went back to my´s to help me with Roof and stayed for dinner. Afterwards we slept together in the room of my brother and we needed a condom of my parents like at the first time. It was all fine and I felt well but then my mum came in. We didn´t know wether she was so angry about it. Sam is the father of my son, so where is the problem? Mum didn´t want us just to have sex because we have a child and I explained to her that we were only thinking of giving it a go for a while. But I was sad after this conversation. It´s not fair because Sam and me didn´t have the same chances to be together like everyone else.

... You can see how it is now. We aren´t together anymore. I´ve got a new boyfriend and he has got a new girlfriend.

2. Sorry, I never told you how Sam looks like. He is a good-looking, tall person. He has got straight dark hair and is often dressed like a skater. Sure, it is his hobby.
This is a photo of him.


Bye, Alicia :*

Another fight - chapter 18

It happend again. Sam and me we had another fight. He came to our house last evening when I hoped to get ten minutes to myself and knocked angry at the door of the bathroom. Yeah, I was already a bit nerved but then he said "I´ve got better things to look at than you." and this was the last thing I wanted to hear at this moment! Sam is already sleeping with another girl? Was it that what he wanted to tell me? I was really angry and shouted at him. I didn´t want that he will ever see Roof again if he is already seeing someone else. But then my mum heared of that and came up. She took us with her in the kitchen and we talked quietly. It turned out that Sam just came to talk about what he read in this report of the Prime Minister that 8 out of 10 young fathers loose touch with their child because he will never want that.

Yes, I really have to say sorry to Sam. This fight was mostly my fault but he shouldn´t had come so angry, too. I hope it will be our last big conflict!

Bye, Alicia

Sams cold - chapter 17

The first thing which surprised me was that Sams father came around and took his son and Roof for something to eat. Dave never came to see our son or even Sam.

Then Sam get a cold and he was coughing and sneezing half the night. He woke me up and picking Roof up with a cold is also not the best for a baby so we talked. It was difficult for me to say :"You could always go back to your old room." Sam always wanted that, especially now after our little fights, but never said it. I had to say it in the right way because it could sound like I would not like to have Sam in my room any longer what is the opposite of that what I really want. We decided that he goes back to his room till he has stopped coughing but I was sure that he would never come back. We will see how it will be in the future...

Bye, Alicia

Jason bloody Gerson - chapter 16

Why couldn´t this day be spared? Sam came from college and told me he had a fight. Ok what could be called a fight. Anyways, he fighted with Jason my ex-boyfriend. He sais Roof would be his child. Sam really disappointed me today. He said it would all fit in very well. He insinuated me that I was already pregnant when we had sex the first time and that I just use him for a father of my child. How Sam can think such a thing of me? I could just cry and pointing out the real facts. We met a year ago, Roof is three weeks old and unless i had an eleven-month pregnancy it can´t be Jason´s. This was logical but it was how little he trust in me what made me sad. I know that he doesn´t like to life in my room and it´s horrible that he had this fight with jason just to have a reason to go home to his mum. I told him all that and in the end he said sorry a lot and we hugged and kissed. That was our first row but it ended good fortunately.

Bye, Alicia

Sam moves in - chapter 15

Today I went home from hospital with Roof. Also Sam moved in. We are going to live together in my room; Roof, Sam and me. He came with his mum and Mark, who helped bringing some things of Sam in my room. I felt confident when it was done and we all sit together but Roof needed feeding and there where to many people around. I think my mum and Sams mum would like to stay but I sent them away. All exept for Sam. Now I really think this was the right decision to be alone with my new little family. Just Sam and me and our cute baby. I didn´t feel happy very often in the last nine month but in this minutes I felt really happy. I mean everything turned good, as much as you can say that. We started to live together and I survived the birth of our son.

Besides, Sam brought a poster of Tony Hawk with him. He didn´t wanted to put it up in my room but I thought about it. He is Sams idol and I know that Sam likes skating very much but how it will be in the future? Will he stop skating for me and Roof? I don´t know whether I want that. Maybe we will find a good way for him between son/family and his hobby skating. This is a photo of his poster:


Bye, Alicia

The birth - chapter 13 + 14

I was pregnant seven month when Sam and I get back our GCSE. Mine was terrible and Sams was OK. So we thought about our future a lot in the summer and I decided to leave school for one year and come back later, when our son will be a year old.

Then the day with the contractions came. I was glad when Sam came into the bathroom and I´m sorry for telling him bad names, but I was scared of the birth. In the hospital Sam did CDs into the CD player which were really horrible. I blamed him for this and screamed at him and mum a lot but I was glad when they did what I wanted at this moment, so mum put her CD on. This terrible contractions made my angry and I shouted a few names at Sam, my mum and the nurse.

Then I hold my baby in my arms and I was happy. He was so cute and small, just beautiful! I heard a slow song in which a man was singing and playing the piano. My mum said the singer was called Rufus Wainwright so I called our son Rufus.

Many people came to visit us and mum and dad said that our son looks similar to me. Sam anwered the question of my dad, if he had got a name yet : " Rufus. Roof." I laughed about this nickname and I liked it. Also I decided that Rufus family name will be Jones, like his daddys family name. Whatever mum and dad wanted to have as his family name. Rufus Jones is Sam and my son.
This is Roof:


Bye, Alicia

On the way to another life - chapter 10+11

Something bad had happened! Everyone, who´s on my and Sams school, knows that I´m pregnant. I just told one very good friends and now everyone knows!!!

But we did something more important, we went to the hospital fo a scan. They told us that everything was normal and that it was a boy :) It´s a new feeling, seeing your own baby on a scan-photo... and I think we´re on the way to a real adult now. Sam and me, we will be parents. Also we kissed on the way back from the hospital and it was another kiss than the last one. I think that´s good. I love him and he loves me, it´s better for the baby to have parents who love each other.

Then we went to a NCT class for pregnant women and their men. My mum said she´d found it useful when she was pregnant. But it wasn´t very nice there. Just older pairs, all happy with their lifes. So we decided afterwards to go to another class with teenagers in our age. But I have to say, it was an experience to see what normal women think about the time after the delivery.

The days are passing by and I´m really glad that I´ve Sam by my side! I´m glad that he is the father of my child and anyone else. We decided to live together in my room after the baby will be born. We told my parents about our plan. Mum thought Sam would come and visit but we want to live together and we want to care about the baby together! I´m thankful that Sam want to do this with me.

Bye, Alicia

P.S. This is our baby on the scan :)

Should we keep the baby - chapter 9

Sam is back. But he wasn´t at school. So I decided to come over his house. I had to tell him that I am pregnant and that I decided to keep the baby. Why you thought? I thought about it a lot and I came to the end that I could not kill my own baby. I decided it without Sam because he wasn´t there and I didn´t want to wait for him because it´s my decision. My body, I am the mother and I have to come along with this pregnancy.
So I went to his house, said hello and started crying. I could not do anything else at this moment. When we started talking he alway said "what you are going to do?" or something like that. Then I told him that I would be glad if he would talk about us! Yes, I decided alone to keep the baby but when it is born it´s ours and we both have to look for it. I was glad that Sam didn´t chicken out of telling this all my parents! So we did this hard thing yesterday. Mum, Dad and Sam, they all had to come along with my decision to keep the baby. This is a concluding thing!
Bye, Alicia

Feelings about Sam - chapter 8

I bought a pregnancy test on my own after I heard that Sam, this coward, just run off. And yes my suspicion confirmed, I AM PREGNANT!!!! But now this stupid boy run off and just leave me alone. I can´t believe it!

Ok maybe i think a little bit to hard about it. Anyway, why he run off? Because of our future? Yes it will be difficult but he doesn´t know wether I´m pregnant or not and it wouldn´t be a reason for leaving me alone! I hope he will be back soon. We really have to talk about all.



I found it in the internet...
Bye, Alicia

Thinking about my future

I should get ready for being pregnant. So I thought about it. How it is with a baby? Will I get it or will I abort my son or daughter? Would it be a girl or a boy and what it would look like? A small Sam – Alicia….? Well, an abortion, is that killing? Could I kill my own baby?
I got to the point that I can’t answer all these questions without Sam. We must meet another time!

Bye, Alicia

Sams Birthday

I wasn’t together with Sam any longer after my message. Yes, I was sad but the life is going on. I went to school and did something in me free time, but I missed him. I had really loved him…but as it seems he didn’t really love me. I don´t know what he wanted… the same as every man? I thought he was different than others but this thought wasn’t right how it looks like.
But then I was very late with my period and worried about being pregnant. Sam is the only one who comes into question of being a father so I decided to contact him and say it to him. I wrote him a message that it’s urgent to see him but it was his birthday.
I couldn’t care less; he had to know it now. He can’t just go away and leave me with the problems! So we met in the café and I told him what I wanted to tell him. Then we wanted to buy a pregnancy test but we hadn’t enough money. So I went home to get more money and he wanted to wait for me in the café.
HE WASN´T THERE WHEN I CAME BACK!!! This a******! He chickened out of this “challenge”. But I didn’t want to do this alone. There are two people who are responsible for this so we both should do it!
I walked home and spend the rest of the day in my room, thinking about my future.

Bye, Alicia

My feelings about Sam - chapter 4

I love him really. But something is wrong. Something is different than all the last weeks with him. Sam wasn’t here for two days and at the third day I asked him to come for lunch with my family. I was really relieved that he didn’t refuse this. But then it wasn’t very nice. Sam seemed nerved all the time.
So I worried about him … and me. What I did wrong? I still love him!
What should I do?

Bye, Alicia

p.s.: I think I’m going to write a message to him…

My feelings about Sam - chapter 3

I love Sam! And we are together now. I love him and he loves me :)
.. this is really great!
After our night, where we wanted to go to the cinema, I can’t get enough of him.
Oh I forgot to tell you about that night. We didn’t go to the cinema because we had so much to say to each other. We went for a cappuccino and after that we went to my home…
Now we see each other every day and I think about him every second of my life. I never fall in love like now before. It´s like walking on clouds :)
Sam he’s fantastic, he’s the best boyfriend you can think of!

Bye, Alicia

Sam and Me - Our first date

Hey, I’m Alicia and now I’m starting to write about my life here, because it really started when I met Sam.
Yesterday was my mums’ birthday party. She invited Mrs Jones (Sams mum) and she took Sam with her to the party. He came to me and we talked a bit, but then he went out of the room because…, yeah, I was a bit unfriendly to him. But I was sorry for that soon. So I went to make a new conversation. The evening turned good and I began to like Sam very much. So I asked him to go to the cinema the next day. I gave him my mobile number so that he can phone me.
But he didn’t do this till now….